We polled our FBFs as well as the members of OUR FAN PAGE and here is what you had to say:

Anthony M. “I would say three straight times and then a majority of the time.”

Tracy L.  “My boyfriend and I have been together for 2-1/2 years he has and still pays every time…..he won’t let me. He says he makes more than me and he was raised that way. But I make all our meals at home.”

Kristen H. “Why does the guy have to pay all the time it is way too stereotypical.”

Michael S. “It’s not stereotypical…. It’s called being a gentleman. Whatever happened to good old fashion chivalry?”

Dadiv L. “All the time every time is the way my parents raised me in Hawaii! If you want to pay your half then you can offer it, it’s then up to the guy to accept or decline.”

Brian M.  “……..wait…….GUYS are supposed to PAY?”

Penny H. “I don’t think a guy should ever pay, however, I overheard a guy at my gym talking about this, and he said he never pays for the first two weeks, then starts to pay for things if the girl sticks around….I found that an interesting perspective also. I won’t let a guy pay for me because I don’t want to feel as if I owe them anything, birthday presents excluded of course, which goes both ways.”

Erica L. “My rule of thumb; is whoever asks the other out on the date should be the one to pay for the date.”

John H. “I still pay for dinner. Even after 28 years of marriage, I still open doors for her. Hold he hand walking down the street. Chivalry is not dead.

Wayne S. “If they are a gentleman then always plus open doors and flowers!”

Tim W.  “Always.”

Gail V. “What happened to looking after one another…perhaps one is in a better position today than the other is……why is there an expectation? I am seriously interested in this question….thanks.”

Donald B. “The rest of his life! J lol!”

Mark F.  “Around the first 3 times….after that it shouldn’t be an issue….it is fun for a woman to take a guy out too. It makes us feel that we are not just a walking ATM, but someone you like. That said it is all common sense if one person has more money, etc…..”

Ann B. “Til he realizes that the girl makes more than him!”

Constance S. “All (meaning always).”

Donna G.  “ALL the time.J”

Lisa W.  “I guess that it depends how hot he is. (Or if he’s a cheap b****** or not).”

Tj G.  “Whenever HE is the one doing the asking.”

Catherin M.  “With Tj, if he is asking he should pay. (Smart women never have to ask a man out)”

Ken B.  “No question about it he should always pay. I don’t even see where the question comes up….first bring back respectability to the whole dating scene. Second if he asks her to pay half or even accepts $ through down the flag cause there is more bad to come….It’s ok to offer I never took it as an insult though as a good will and intentions that she is not a digger….not on a date no way. MAN-UP!”

Terry W.  “Every time!!!!!!”

Daisy N.  “ALWAYS!”

Keith N.  “Depends how hot she is.”

Kim T.  “All of them.”

Gina V.  “All of them or he is not serious.”

James S. “All of them for at least a month or two…at least, I never even let a girl go near her wallet maybe I am old fashion. ”

Rich  H. “Three tops….and then split of she should pay. It’s almost more of offer as much as actually paying.”

Janet K.  “Are you kidding split it 50/50 unless you are destitute!!!!”

Lenay R. “Old Fashion Is the Way!!!!!…..It’s nice to be treated but once I am dating him he gets spoiled by me as well….. J”

Blakney C.  “100% of the time….forever!”

Devin B.  “All of them!! She can buy you a drink or a shot at the bar but that is still pushing it!! A real gentleman never lets a woman pay! If you can’t afford to take a woman out, then cook for her.”

Kristin T.  “If he asks – he pays, but if you’ve been on three or more, nice to buy a round or take care of the tip as a gesture. At least offer.

Julie B.  “Do something nice for him. I gave my last date a really nice home pedicure after we got done with dinner at his place. Nothing else, he loved it. Really nice pampering for nothin’ and I went home afterwards J Do something priceless.”

Have a great day and thanks for all the responses…….Courtney, Christine, Erin and Nannette.

Are you considering dating after a divorce? What to do is daunting to consider dating after experiencing a divorce, especially after spending ten or more years with someone. By implementing these tips I am certain you will become more comfortable and even enjoy dating because it is a process that can be structured to fit your needs. There is no right time to start dating. Being ready to date is less about a timeline and more about how ready you are to have companionship in your life. If you are harboring negative feelings about your ex, are angry or resentful, are going through a legal battle you are most likely not ready. Or if you find yourself obsessing or continuously talking about your divorce with your friends so much that they are sick of hearing about it, you are not ready. Get busy and do things you enjoy. Try doing something that you have always wanted to do but did not because you were taking care of the household. You may want to take classes to explore what you want to create in your life now. Take your time meeting new people and learn about them over time. Put less focus on dating and more focus on you experiences new things and new people with the goal of creating a new you and your new life. On the other hand, if you are considering the following questions you may be ready to start dating. What do I want my dating experience to be like? What to I want the second or third date to be like? How soon will I have sex when dating? When will I introduce my date to my children/family? When will I feel comfortable with my date knowing where I live? How do I want to be treated during the date and by my date?

Dating is a healthy choice when you are madly in love with your “SELF”. Know how you want your dating experience to look like is an indication that you are complete with your past relationship, and that you feel excited about your new found freedom. This blog post was written by Dr. Dar and is part of our guest blogger series. I you would like to connect with Dr. Dar you can visit her on the web at: http://www.relationshipsuccessexpert.com .

These post are meant to be inspiring to women and do not necessarily reflect the religious, political or other view points of Nannette Bosh, Nannette Bosh Inc., http://www.bangleandclutch.com, Ask Nannette, asknannette.com or nannettebosh.com. As always we welcome your thoughts and comments. We think Dr. Dar would look good wearing http://www.bangleandclutch.com/jewelry/necklaces/alexandria-violet.html/

Being able to communicate openly is the key to any happy and successful relationship. How open are you? Let’s face it, there are bumpy roads in all relationships but fighting fair is the best way to keep the lines of communication open and prevent a molehill from becoming a mountain.

1)  Don’t speak without first taking a moment when you are upset. If you must wait a day or two until you have cooled down then so be it. You don’t want to wind up saying something that you will regret and can’t take back.

2)  Don’t harbor resentment for unaddressed or unacknowledged past feelings. Figure out exactly what the argument is about. Is the problem that the ice cube tray didn’t get filled or is it that last week your partner came home late and you were left feeling hurt and worried?

3)  Don’t use “YOU ALWAYS” or “YOU NEVER”. Always and never bare negative connotations and automatically put your partner on the defense because they come across as accusatory. Be sure to say “I feel” such and such. Quite frankly your partner doesn’t feel that way, you do.

4)  Don’t waste time you and your partner have together. There are things worth arguing about and things you should just let go. Save arguments for the things that are most important to you so issues of importance will hold more weight.

5)  Don’t hold your partner accountable for the things your last partner did to you. This is not your previous partner.

6)  Don’t fight if you or your partner has had a couple of cocktails. This is a sure way to have a full knock out fight instead of being able to rationally negotiate.

7)  Don’t make idol threats. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Should you blurt out “If you do it again I’m leaving you”, then you better be ready to pack otherwise when you speak your words will have NO value.

8)  Don’t fight or argue in public. Your friends and or family will become uncomfortable, stuck in the middle or worse yet not want to spend time with either of you.  

9)  Don’t be rude and disrespectful to your partner.  If the two of you are best friends then treat each other as such.

10) Don’t assume you know what your partner is thinking. You are not a mind reader. If there is something truly bothering you speak up and be honest, your partner can’t read your mind either.

11) Don’t name call. This is not only childish it is completely unacceptable.

12) Don’t treat your partner in any manner that you yourself would not want to be treated. Hold yourself to the same standard of behavior you are expecting from your partner. Good for the goose is good for the gander.

13) Don’t’ be afraid to be the first one to apologize. Saying you’re sorry for hurting someone is not a sign of weakness it is actually a sign of strength because you were unafraid to go first.

Bonus rule: Don’t be afraid to laugh. If you have a lifestyle or relationship question email nannettebosh@asknannette.com. Keep an eye out for our guest bloggers……………..

Thirteen Don’t(s) for Fighting Fair by Certified Lifestyle & Relationship Coach Nannette Bosh. The owner of http://www.bangleandclutch.com Nannette Bosh welcomes your thoughts comments and questions. This post was provided courtesy of asknannette.com.

First dates are usually nerve racking enough but what I end up thinking about the most is what am I going to wear? I know each date varies depending on what you’re doing and where you’re going , but for me I feel like the first date is truly an impression of who you are and what you wear really reflects how that person is going to perceive you. Now when choosing an outfit you must always use caution. You don’t want to go overboard yet you don’t want to seem like you grabbed the first two things you found in your closet. You always want to make the person think you did a little extra something just for them so not only are you  feeling  great , but you get him wondering, “Wow she did all this for me?“  Well your at least hoping they say that after you spent the past week  and a small fortune picking out the perfect shoes , clothes, accessories and  even what your wearing underneath  it all, just in case. Need help pulling it all together for free? Visit  http://www.bangleandclutch.com/getthelook/  

The man however will  probably just  think about what he’s wearing 5 minutes after he’s out of the shower,  pick up some clothes that have been laying around and smell them to make sure they are clean and all this happening just a mere 30 minutes away from meeting you. The ironic thing is most men can pull a great look together in that short amount of time where as we feel we need hours of preparation. So you have to wonder is it worth it? Are we really doing all this for them or deep down is it for us, or a combination of both. As woman we tend to overdo things a bit, over think, and build these elaborate fantasies in our head of how everything should be. We will rethink these things over and over again. We are lucky if they think about it at all. So I’ve always wondered why we put so much energy into someone we don’t even know will appreciate the stunning ensemble we pulled together. I truly believe we do it for ourselves. I feel when you’re in something that makes you feel beautiful you radiate that to the rest of the world and that gives you your best accessory, CONFIDENCE. 

I do have one little piece of advice/ warning:  A first date is not the time to try out the latest trend, or wear crazy makeup. Go with something you know is classic but screams you. Do not try to channel your inner Lady Gaga or even  Victoria  Beckham, because chances are if you rocking a Lady Gaga  ensemble I don’t know how long your date is going to last, unless he’s really into that than more power to him and you . The point I’m getting at is the first date outfit really is about your individuality and gives you that boost of confidence you need to walk into the date thinking wow this guy is lucky to be seen with me. 

Now for me I think cute little dresses with special details like braided straps, or a low back or even a simple flower decal around the hem always seems to get the job done.  Also a popular favorite for many and what most men seem to find the sexiest is a great pair of jeans with a pretty and feminine top. This outfit seems the least intimidating to the man but still screams sex appeal in the down to earth kind of way. I guess you could call it the girl next door look. Also it guarantees you a night of comfort and can be easily thrown together just by grabbing simples pieces from your wardrobe. However if  you go for this laid back look you may want to glam it up a little and  add some sparkle with your accessories you put on. Pile on some bangles, layer some necklaces, or reach for those earrings that always get you noticed. Adding the accessories really helps individualize your look and makes you stand out.  However if you’re not really into overloading on accessories, a simple pair of earrings or a bracelet will do just fine too. As long as you go off feeling confident in yourself that’s what truly going to make you shine the brightest. Oh and a pair of killer heels never hurts either.

Want to know the 10 Things He Secretly Thinks About Your Clothes? Check out http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/2010/01/10-things-he-secretly-thinks-about-your-clothes#slide=1

This blog post was written by Christine from Bangle and Clutch and provided courtesy of asknanette.com. Please let us know your thoughts in the comment section.